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February 28, 2013

Hands On Homework

Hands On Homework Help for Parents Homework is often a source of anxiety and struggle for parents, particularly if your child resists homework. Providing a structure to the homework process can be very helpful. Here are some helpful tips: 1. Create a routine – There are many opinions about what works best, but know your child and develop a homework routine that works for you. If you are able, encourage your child to get homework done right away after school so they have as much play and relaxation time as possible. If your child needs to blow off steam after school or you pick him or her up from daycare, have them do homework after some play time. Limit the time and give your child an opportunity to transition when he or she has to stop playing. 2. Have a specific location for completing homework - with all of the supplies your child will need to complete their work. 3. Do a backpack check for any important papers or to check for assignments. Ask questions about what you find. This information will help you understand how your child is feeling about school and the work that must be done. 4. Break it down – If your child has a lot of homework, help him or her break it down into smaller, more manageable bits. It may be helpful to offer a five-minute movement break between tasks if your child has difficulty keeping focused. 5. What worked for you may not work for your child – Understand that you and your child may be wired differently. You will have to tweak the routine based on your child’s individual needs. If you were a “get your work done right after school” type of kid and your child is a “blow off steam” kind of kid, allow that adjustment. You’ll find that if you consider your child’s temperament, the homework process will be less painless. 6. Minimize distractions – Keep the television and video games off during homework time. It splits focus and makes homework take longer. This can lead to stress and frustration. 7. Save the reading for right before bedtime – Use reading as one to one wind down time with you. As your child becomes more independent in their reading, grab a book and read alongside your child. Adults need a little wind down time too. 8. Finally, avoid the power struggle, not the homework – Encourage your child and celebrate when they get their homework done. Try to focus on what they have accomplished and not what they are not doing right. If he or she needs to redo or add to their work, off the feedback as constructively as possible. If you find yourself getting frustrated, step away for a minute. Manage your emotions before returning to help your child.

October 21, 2012

Moment,Relationship, and Death

When someone loses a loved one,typically there is going to be an assortment of emotions that person would need to sort through. The common one experienced,of course,is sadness. Another emotion experienced is regret. This emotion could turn to a self defeating belief,which certainly will complicate the grief process. When an individual passes away, weather sudden or prolonged, the survivor(s) will reflect back on the relationship. Instead of focusing on the relationship as a whole, they would pick a moment in time, usually the last interaction(or close to last)they may have had with the deceased. This moment could be something said or not said or something done or not done. A child may have walked away to take a break and a parent who was terminally ill passed. A couple could have gotten into an argument and the spouse died unexpectantly. The thoughts that evolve from this could impact on how a person deals with he loss."He dies alone", "This is the last moment we had", "I never said how much she meant to me". These are all passages in time the grieved could dwell on. In reality, there are very few story book closures we can have. If the relationship was significant, true closure may not happen for a time after death. Naturally we want to squeeze every moment we can out of significant relationships. However, it is important to focus on the relationship as a whole. Focusing on a part of it is truly not reflective on the relationship as a whole. One quiz does not make a grade, one report does not make a career, and one interaction does not define the relationship.

October 16, 2012

Mark Myers Expert Answer to:I'm extremely depressed and angry about being unemployed for some time. How do I go on without having a mental breakdown?

In today's economy, I am sure you are not alone. There are many people who share your plight. The fear you face is understandable. Individuals could experience the following feelings: worry, unproductive, boredom, self defeated, and pessimistic, to name a few emotions. It is important that you take steps to try to take control over areas of your life that you can. Click for more

October 3, 2012

Mark Myers expert answer to: Depression: I keep punishing myself, always doing the opposite of what I should. How can I quit doing this? There is a self defeating cycle you have gotten yourself into. When you do not accomplish tasks that you like to, you beat yourself up. The more you beat yourself up the less confident you more

September 21, 2012

Genetic Link to Internet Addiction Identified!


Internet addiction is not a figment of the imagination, according to a study published in the Journal of Addiction Medicine. Interestingly, the study also found that the link occurs more frequently in women. Read more: http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/332082#ixzz278nRQWi9

September 20, 2012

Process versus Results


We are a result driven society. Places of employment, voters, consumers, and within the medical field, look at results as being the measuring stick of success. There are many businesses and government agencies whose sole function is to gauge results of an industry or product. This is the nature of our culture. In addressing issues between two individuals, it is counterproductive if we rely too much on results for measuring success. Obviously we want our efforts to pay off and reach a successful outcome. The challenge is that there are too many variables in place to solely rely on this as a true measuring stick of our efforts. Examples that come to mind are relationships. When a husband or wife believes their efforts in repairing a relationship are measured by them staying married, this leads to problems. If the husband or wife is involved with someone else, has already checked out of the marriage, or has a drug, alcohol, or mental health problem that impacts on them, the likelihood of them remaining married will be limited. The person is depending on the other person acting on good faith and being of sound mind. In this scenario, and others like it, the outcome will not be to their satisfaction. This also applies to other areas aside from marriage. An individual I counseled left his place of employment he was at for several years. He left on great terms and kept in touch with his supervisor after he left. After a time, his former supervisor offered him a position back at the company. This included a considerable raise and other perks. He talked it over with his wife, family and friends as well as the head of the company and decided to take the position. As time passed, the company reneged on its promises creating an uncomfortable working environment. The person left the company with bad feelings. The decision he made did not provide for good results but the process he went about making the decision was healthy. Unfortunately, the outcome of the decision was depending on other party’s good faith and abilities. Instead of completely relying on results, access the process and effort you are putting in. Objectively evaluate what you can do differently. Accept your limitations of being human. Understand you are not able to control others and their decision making process. This will allow you to feel less guilty and free to make healthy choices. The recognition of your limitations in resolving the problem, will free up emotional energy to focus on decision making or maintenance.

September 15, 2012

Mark Myers Expert Answer to: Why do I hate myself and how do I stop?

Why do I hate myself and how do I stop? Why you hate yourself is not important as to what to do about it. Often times, individuals find themselves in a bad spot. How they got could be influenced by genetics, life events, childhood upbringing, and/or current relationships(family, friends,work). Rather then focusing on the why's, invest your energies into changing thoughts and behaviors that are allowing you to struggle. more